I don't know what this time is but I am awake.
Oh, it's so bloody cold outside.
So how do cool kids hang out these days? Well, that's not something I ask myself but Amanda, who sits next to me, has been hanging out on Orkut.
Apparently Orkut is as big as Facebook in some parts of the planet.
It's one thing to stalk the personal trainer at the gym, it's quite another to rummage through personal profiles of people on the other side of the world. Which is what we're doing. Obviously.
Check. This. Out.
He lists his favourite cuisine as "sucking humans blood when I get mad."
I guess you don't want to make Baba mad then. Here he is hanging out in the garden...
Do you think they make endless jokes filled with innuendo about "shooting one off" etc?
Go and see more of Baba here.
I have to say that I prefer Faizan and I think you will like him too...
Faizan is a little odd, having videos of bodybuilding and the World Trade Centre disaster among his favourites.
Then, what do you think of er - I think it's Mirza...
He's into Pakistani Army Fighters, bodybuilding and others who have blood group Type-B.
Oh yeah, Mirza is the one on the right in black. His friend in the red is hotter though.
It's so weird to peek into the lives of people who live in an almost parallel universe to yours...
Does anyone have a cleaner I can have?
We have a new one, Christina, and ohmygod. When we left her a list of things she needs to do, I was tempted to put on the list "make sure you wear a fucking balaclava" because at least then it would be obvious that she was thieving us.
She charges £10 an hour for a minimum of three hours. Fuck!
She has to go.
Even though I swore that I wouldn't get into it, I have downloaded Alexandra Burke's new single and I am loving it, I'm sorry to say.
And ohmygod. Sally and I have got tickets to Whitney Houston for next April. It's so gay, it's so exciting.
Do you think it's weird that some people give things names? Like someone I know calls their laptop Zebedee. I think that's odd.
And others give their cars names. And their cocks.
I think people who do it are slightly unhinged. It's a car for god's sake.
Come to think of it, my grandparents used to call their vacuum cleaner Horace. Why, I cannot tell you?!
Yeah, I've just phoned Sally. She's in bed and I'm typing this on my bed.
She used to call her old car The Bitchmobile. Ho ho ho...
Oh god, I need to go to bed. I have to be up at 05:50 again. Fuck.