A few days / months / years ago I wrote something about wine bottles in the Sainsbury's.
You can either poke your eyes out with the receiver of a cordless telephone or read about it again here.
Anyway, so today I went for lunch, here is the sign to the entrance and it was lovely.
I chased three slices of cold meat around the plate with my fork and some elderly codger from Surrey tried to chat me up.
That was very odd given that he was about 90 years old. I shuddered a little actually.
I'm in Cape Town now because I got on an airplane at Heathrow that flew all the way here. Here's a picture of the front portion of the plane...
The back end of it is still at Heathrow? Or I dunno how the system works actually.
Well, I do know how it works but it's more silly to pretend that I don't.
Did you know that I bought my epileptic brother a strobe light for his birthday?
He's going to have a fit when he sees it!
Er, sorry but I ripped that off Popbitch but it's an easy joke to retell. And now you can amuse guests at dinner parties / social gathering / sex orgies with it too.
And thus I believe I have lowered the tone sufficiently, so I shall now quit. Before I go however, here's a picture that could also be a proverb.
Get it? It's not too difficult.
And the dog is Gus by the way. He's my parents' dog and I think he's a bit of wimp.