Saturday, 6 June 2009

Saturday blurry

???? ?????? ???? ? ??? ????????? ???????? ???? ????????? ? ???? ?????? ???? ? ??? ????????? ???????? ???? ?????

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I am awake in a hotel room and there is brown stuff smeared all over my face, the bed and on the T-shirt I am wearing.

This is what happens when you fall into bed drunk and don't move the complimentary chocolates.

I am sitting at the Waterfront with Alex (who we all love and you should too) and we are drinking beer. Alex is the only person in the whole world who I can do this with.
(If you've been following my woeful tale for some time, Alex is The Boy On The Left Right.).

Alex and I are watching the Grand Prix qualifiers and I am eating a pizza and this is the most carbs I have had in about two months.

We are also drinking alcohol and this isn't good because less than twelve hours ago I was so drunk I could not stand up. But it is acceptable because we're on holiday and who cares? Nobody cares.

I certainly don't.

I think at this point I need a disco nap.

"Bobs you were very very drunk last night."

"Yeah, we met last night but you were very very drunk and probably don't remember."

Jo who is the very sexy lesbian bar lady (seriously, you would...) is pulling a blinder.

I have said to Jo "listen, if anyone wants to buy me a shot of alcohol, please put water in the glass and not tequila."

So far I have had three "shots" and I am still as sober as teetotal making their way through an airport in Saudi Arabia.

How much do we love Jo? We love her a lot.

Yes. Last night I was drunk. I had a party. People bought me alcohol. I licked some people's faces. It was revolting.
Sue me.
If one more person reminds me about it...
(Secretly I am loving it though)

I have a camera with me so that I can take photos and document the evening for your viewing pleasure and I have decided at this point to take a picture for you to savour and enjoy.

The rest of the evening will head in this direction although I have had another shot of water so perhaps it won't.

"Yes, you won't remember me from last night. I'm one of Nick's friends. We met but I think you were too drunk to realise. You licked my face."

Goddamit. This is the third fucking person who I don't remember meeting on Friday night.

There are lesbians fighting. It's fabulous.


BJ said...

23:26 is quite scary I must say.

Anonymous said...

I think you will find that you are the boy on the left....

Bobby Cox said...

BJ: Seriously. It was lesbians having a serious bitch fight. And it spilled out into the road and they were bawling around on the road and stopped the traffic. It. was. brilliant!

Anon: I think you will find that you are indeed correct on this issue. (thank you)!x