Friday 20 June 2008

Another beginning

Warning: Herewith follows the ramblings of a smug cunt, proceed at your own risk. Bring the sick bag, use the gun as you wish.

I've sat down, having just got in.

A few hours ago I was standing in the gym change-room in a towel. Getting dressed at the bench opposite is a young blonde turk, cute with a great body. He looks at me and I glance back but then find fascination with something else.

He looks at me again, I glance back at him. And again. His staring is making me a little nervous so I put on the straightest swagger I can muster to go and get a tissue to wipe my nose. On the way back he looks at me again.

"Don't you have somewhere to go to?"

I think "fuck, he thinks I'm cruising him. Fuck. And he's straight and I am really not... Shit." Me, completely defensively; "I don't know what you're talking about - I'm about to go home..."

Now doing aggro-straight; "and what are you trying to say?" He, almost apologetically, "sorry, no I... don't worry."

I leave it at that and wait for him to leave. Outside the door of the gym he is standing, playing with his phone. I walk out and don't even glance at him. But this is weird so I stop a few metres from him and pull my phone out of my bag to play with.

And then he walks on ahead. About 20 feet down the pavement he turns around to look at me and flicks his head for me to come over. Fuck... does this really mean what I think it does?

I catch up with him. He puts his hand out and I shake it.

"Sorry, the words didn't come out my mouth like they should have. I meant; 'if you've got nothing to do, would you like to go somewhere.'"

Me, amused and somehow getting all the words in the right order; "oh, right..! I didn't know what you meant. Listen, no-one has ever been quite that direct with me in the gym. Sorry, I was just completely taken aback..."

His voice drops "sorry, yeah I saw you and thought I would just ask because it didn't look like it was going to work any other way and I would be kicking myself if you got away. So would you like to do something?"

"Mate, I am flattered and because you did it so confidently, I have such respect. Really, that is a first.

"Does that mean 'no' then?"

"Does it fuck? Mate how could I ever say 'no' to the confidence that you plucked up to ask me. So your place or mine?"

"Well my parents are away..."

21 years old, at University and lives with his (wealthy, it seems) parents who're on holiday. We spent a good solid hour and a half doing interaction work.

Afterwards I am lying and looking at the ceiling. "Is everything okay, you seem distracted."

"No, I just suddenly thought "what the fuck am I doing here... this was never in my work-out schedule!" We laugh.

So there. I cannot fucking believe it.

My first interaction as a 30 year old and he was 21. And he picked me up at the gym.

I decide to walk home because it's not that far. iPod on, I stick on a little ditty by Marilyn Manson; "The Reflecting God", from his Last Tour on Earth CD.

And Manson sings....

Die, shoot, shoot motherfucker!
Shoot! Shoot! Shoot motherfuckers...

Young scum, can you feel my power?
Shoot! Shoot! Shoot motherfuckers...

Young, scum can you feel my power?
Shoot! Shoot! Shoot motherfuckers...

While Mr Manson spits and screams into my ear I gently smile to myself.

I will probably see him at the gym again. He was hot. He had a sixpack. Perhaps we might do it again. The first interaction of my 30s, of the new leaf, of the new me.

This is how I hoped these years would be. I know, I know! It's just casual. Whatever.

I sacrifice those who've been before tonight, all on the altar of learning.

My life began at 30. So far so good. Let's call him Gareth.

13 comments:

Timmy said...

Sending you a high five from across the pond! Just goes to prove that live does begin at 30!

Sounds like you worked two sweats in one night.

S said...

Try doing that with a 16-year-old, then we'll talk. Oh yeah. We'll talk.

Anonymous said...

If you were still having any worries about tirning 30 - just remember the old addage - your only as old the twenty something your nobbing.

Robert Cox said...

Timster: So thanks... yeah, I did perspire again, after I'd showered.

Stevey-weavy: Yeah, or me talking to the police more like.

Monkey-see, Monkey-do: I like that saying actually. Now that I am pervy old man, I am going to use it repeatedly.

rickisimus2 said...

Nice start for your 30s. 30s are much better than 20s.

Congrats!

Anonymous said...

Multiculturism is great, no?

Robert Cox said...

Ricki Sixx: So yeah - 30 is the new 19.

Marco Polo: Multiculturalism is always good. (Why do you say this?)

MadeInScotland said...

Hey. I don't think I properly welcomed Bobby v3.0

That's the blog and the cu*t that writes it (only joking)

So from the pool by all these HOT fcuking Israelis,

ahoj 3.0

Anonymous said...

Marco Polo: Multiculturalism is always good. (Why do you say this?) - I think he was commenting on the fact that it was a turk you shagged - im not sure whether it was someone with a Turkish passport or you meant the young turk as in the cultural reference for someone wanting change

Robert Cox said...

Czechered: Yes, go get them HOT Israelis. They're all mostly beautiful.

Fleet Street: Mwhahahaha! I love it! I mean young turk as in a young person - not a Turkish person. That is quite funny actually. He wasn't Turkish anyway. He was very English.
Oh, that's made my day.

Monty said...

Well done you!!! 30's are DEFINITELY much much better!!! Enjoy!

Just Me said...

That took some balls on his part. Way to start off your 30's.

Anonymous said...

Nice one bruv!