Thursday, 26 June 2008

I'm being screwed

I am ruined. Absolutely gone and tomorrow it's going to be even worse.

Here is the recipe for how to annihilate yourself in a few easy steps.

Step 1: Wednesday evening
After work, instead of going home and getting ready for bed in preparation for 14-hour day on Thursday, go out with South African mate and cane three bottles of beautiful Boschendal wine.

Step 2: Thursday morning, 4am
Wake up because of bedroom light which is still on, sprawled naked on bed. Stagger into pyjamas.

Step 3: Thursday morning, 6am
Wake up by alarm clock / phone ringing because cab is car is waiting outside. Put on clothes, have no breakfast and pile into car.

Step 4: Thursday
Spend day in sun at Major Tennis Tournament in SW19 dealing with presenters, camera crews, scripts, microphones, arsey security guards, bad accreditation, people who don't park where they're told, people who hear but don't listen, people who wander off, people who don't care, people who can't speak in complete sentences. All this with the help of ONE large Starbucks latte.

Step 5: Thursday lunchtime
Feel faint but soldier on regardless in the sun. Sweating alcohol and hanging in on four hours' sleep.

Step 6: Thursday evening
Spend two hours in traffic through Roehampton and Hammersmith while getting back to the office where the work continues. Still hungry, sunburnt nose and smelly because got dressed in hurry and didn't put deodorant on and have been running around in the sun all day.

Do more work at the office.

Step 7: 23.20-ish
Get home, undress, put on pyjamas and reply to email. Then think "shit, I should write a blog or something" but look at time.
t's just about midnight and tomorrow morning at 6am another car is coming to pick me up to take me back to work for another 14-hour day.
I need to go to sleep now otherwise tomorrow's going to be another fucking nightmare of

10 comments:

Monty said...

Sorry, I got distracted at Thursday 4am with the thought of you sprawled naked across your bed...mmmmmmm... ;-)

Timmy said...

I have a question about Step 7. Did you ever take a shower? Just asking. :-)

Bobby Cox said...

Monty: It's not sexy at all... you're welcome to come and see if you like. You'll get queasy.

Timmy: no shower! there's no time - and please note it's 7am... and I am at work.
(actually i did shower but the story works better if I don't...)
and I need some anti-histamines because I am sneezing like mad.

Monty said...

Trust me...more than happy to come and see...next time I'm in London! OR you could send pics...? :-)

fleetmonkey said...

Given what you are upto this week -you can probably answer the question Sue Barker as nice as she comes across on telly or complete cow?

Do they have Starbucks @ nodelbmiW? you would think they would have got into the venue if not and then you could caffeine yourself as much as you like.

The Neighbors Will Hear said...

The moral here is clear: sleep in the nude. Pyjamas are evil.

Alfred said...

look at that you got beautiful life.God love you forever.

Anonymous said...

14 hours, Ha!....I wish. Try 96 hours. I just got snagged for a mandatory 24 hour shift, right as I was walking out the door after working 72 straight hours. Grrrrr.

I don’t even get to partake in the joy of wine to numb the pain. :(

One of the guys I work with is in the same boat. We have decided to sit in the corner all day and bitch. (Between calls of course)

Signed,
Disgruntled Firechick

Hope today was better for you.

dickophile said...

poor bobby. you should get an assistant or something to make your life easier. a hot assistant who is willing to do anything to please you and make your life easier.

seahorse said...

sounds like a lekker jol...african style! The rules.. Just dont stop. Keep going. Do what we did last night (at the ice rink) and put a cocktail in your coffee flask. Just dont let someone else sip on it. How is ol wimbledon going anywayz? Havent had one moment to watch yet? Managed to record newsnight on BBCA on thursday regarding Zim. That shit must come to and end soon.